Hate is a Strong Word, but I Really, Really, Really Don't Like You.
Just so you all know, that song is fantastic, when shouted by your roommate to her non-existant (well, non-call backy) boyfriend as you drive her home, drunk as hell, from the Karaoke Bar.
Good Times.
Let's recap shall we.
Well yesterday, it was Monday, and Monday is Karaoke Night. We had decided to go out on Monday, after unilaterally deciding that a. Boys Suck, b. Josh (roomies bf) sucks and c. We were too pretty to wait on a guy to realize how awesome we were. (Ahem, if you are reading this blog and you are a guy, chances are I am not talking about you sucking, because hey how could you suck, you are reading the blog...) The best part about living at my house is that we are utterly supportive of each others likes and dislikes. For example, if I go on a bad date, or the guy I like doesn't treat me great or the BF stops calling (like he did yesterday) or she feels sad, the other will complete fall into line with either the he's so awesome mindset, or we hate all boys and must go out and remind each other how awesome we are mindset.... so while I don't have any severe boy trama, I wholeheartedly concur that boys suck, josh sucks, and we were too pretty to be treated like crap. So we got dressed and went out.
Round One-(I was the designated driver, so my round one was Diet Coke, Roomie- Miller Light and a Shot of Patron (double))- Our waitress LisaMarie was super cool she brought chilled double shots, and listened to my roommate rant for ten minutes on how she gets treated like crap, and I inspire apathy (pronounced after 2 shots of patron as a-pap-athy, by the roomie and aside... truly, is there anything worse than a guy being all Meh-y about you, it totally cuts down on self-worth, apparently LisaMarie and I have the same issue... the boys like us, but not enough to write songs about us, which seems like a stupid thing to want, but seriously, I WISH I could inspire boys to write rage songs, but apparently, not) and the roomie got up to sing a little Fiona Apple "Limp". Forget Alanis Morrissette, Fiona Apple has the market cornered on girl music...
Round 2- (Iced Water-Me, Kamakazzee Shots and another shot of Patron for the Roomie) The bitter bitter girl rantings (roomie) continuted, only at this point they got a little funny. The we started playing "I Wish." "I wish," is a game that the roomie and I invented a little over 2 years ago when we had crap jobs. One person starts with a wish that is just never going to happen and the other has to raise said wish.
"Well, I wish that everything in the world was free just for us,"
Roomie-"well, I wish that XXXX wasn't a stupid face,"
Me- "I wish, Tom Brady, would fall in love with me and tell me I am the smartest most bestest girl in the world."
Roomie- "HA, well I WISH, that I had 3 million dollars, and I could have a new car and clothes, plus tongiht Josh will stand out side of our house with a boombox tears in his eyes and declare his undying love"...
Then we laugh about the never going to happen of it all... yes, we are slightly ridiculous at times.
LisaMarie even joined in... You rock LisaMarie.
Roomie sings, Hook by Blues Traveler
Round 3 -(Ice for me. Kamakazee Shots for the Roomie... JM, Nate, Ben*nate's brother*, Scott and Roxy--- beers) Nor is a happy girl at this point, happy and enraged. Funtastic. When all of a sudden JM thinks it's a great idea to ask the roomie, where is the BF. For the record gents, if you see a girl with several shot glasses in front of her,furiously writing down Fiona Apple or Alanis songs, DO NOT ASK WHERE HER BF IS. Clearly. So JM buys round 4 of the roomie's booze. Patron.
JM sings Taking Back Sunday.
Around this time, a girl kills the whole Karoke Computer System by wanting to sing Paris Hilton stars are blind. So the bar helps out by acapellaing, Jingle Bells and then for equalities sake... the Driedal Song. HA... Ben provides amusement by cracking my roommate and me up with stupid stories about nate.
Round 4 (Nothing for me. Double Chilled Patron and Miller Light for Roomie) Around this time, the roomie wanted the phone I took away from her back. Thankfully, friends don't let friends drunk dial and RANT. Around this time, the roomie and I thought it would be a great idea to peel off beer labels and wear them as eye patches, so we could be the Beer pirate twins, (hahaha, when I do supportive, I go all the way supportive. Love it.) General chit chat around the table includes Nate's hitting on Paris Hilton Girl, why Ben was crazy as a young guy, ASVAB scores and helicopters. All had while we wore beer pirate patches.
Nor talks Ben into doing Micheal and Janet Jackson's Scream.
Round 5 (nothing for Me... roomie is still working on Miller Light) Drunk Roomie with me as backup sings... Salt-n-peppa "none of your business" I am not really sure if I was Salt or Peppa, but my job was to say None of you Business... loudly at the right intervals.... HA... We did get raucous applause, it could have been cause we were so bad... whatever.
Round 6 (water here, more Miller or maybe the same Miller for Roomie) Drunk Roomie and Ben preform Scream... complete with running man, ass shaking and a little slithering. Ben didn't know the words but he made up for it with style, pizzazz and a complete willingness to make a fool out of himself. Frankly, I find those qualities admirable in a man... Ben. Whereever you are. You Rock and you are more than welcome to crash Karaoke anytime.
Finally Nate closed out the night for us, with a "livin' la vida loca," back up dancers (that would be me and roomie) included. He put Ricky Martin to shame.
Then we took off for home, roomie yelling the song and me trying to keep her drunk ass in the car. Off to McDonalds we went, for some super sized fries.... I would tell you the story of the McDonalds drive through, but I want to save something for another day. But be aware, the McDonalds story involves a poor server named Luis and my roommate dang near breaking up his marriage. Ha.
Good Times.
Let's recap shall we.
Well yesterday, it was Monday, and Monday is Karaoke Night. We had decided to go out on Monday, after unilaterally deciding that a. Boys Suck, b. Josh (roomies bf) sucks and c. We were too pretty to wait on a guy to realize how awesome we were. (Ahem, if you are reading this blog and you are a guy, chances are I am not talking about you sucking, because hey how could you suck, you are reading the blog...) The best part about living at my house is that we are utterly supportive of each others likes and dislikes. For example, if I go on a bad date, or the guy I like doesn't treat me great or the BF stops calling (like he did yesterday) or she feels sad, the other will complete fall into line with either the he's so awesome mindset, or we hate all boys and must go out and remind each other how awesome we are mindset.... so while I don't have any severe boy trama, I wholeheartedly concur that boys suck, josh sucks, and we were too pretty to be treated like crap. So we got dressed and went out.
Round One-(I was the designated driver, so my round one was Diet Coke, Roomie- Miller Light and a Shot of Patron (double))- Our waitress LisaMarie was super cool she brought chilled double shots, and listened to my roommate rant for ten minutes on how she gets treated like crap, and I inspire apathy (pronounced after 2 shots of patron as a-pap-athy, by the roomie and aside... truly, is there anything worse than a guy being all Meh-y about you, it totally cuts down on self-worth, apparently LisaMarie and I have the same issue... the boys like us, but not enough to write songs about us, which seems like a stupid thing to want, but seriously, I WISH I could inspire boys to write rage songs, but apparently, not) and the roomie got up to sing a little Fiona Apple "Limp". Forget Alanis Morrissette, Fiona Apple has the market cornered on girl music...
Round 2- (Iced Water-Me, Kamakazzee Shots and another shot of Patron for the Roomie) The bitter bitter girl rantings (roomie) continuted, only at this point they got a little funny. The we started playing "I Wish." "I wish," is a game that the roomie and I invented a little over 2 years ago when we had crap jobs. One person starts with a wish that is just never going to happen and the other has to raise said wish.
"Well, I wish that everything in the world was free just for us,"
Roomie-"well, I wish that XXXX wasn't a stupid face,"
Me- "I wish, Tom Brady, would fall in love with me and tell me I am the smartest most bestest girl in the world."
Roomie- "HA, well I WISH, that I had 3 million dollars, and I could have a new car and clothes, plus tongiht Josh will stand out side of our house with a boombox tears in his eyes and declare his undying love"...
Then we laugh about the never going to happen of it all... yes, we are slightly ridiculous at times.
LisaMarie even joined in... You rock LisaMarie.
Roomie sings, Hook by Blues Traveler
Round 3 -(Ice for me. Kamakazee Shots for the Roomie... JM, Nate, Ben*nate's brother*, Scott and Roxy--- beers) Nor is a happy girl at this point, happy and enraged. Funtastic. When all of a sudden JM thinks it's a great idea to ask the roomie, where is the BF. For the record gents, if you see a girl with several shot glasses in front of her,furiously writing down Fiona Apple or Alanis songs, DO NOT ASK WHERE HER BF IS. Clearly. So JM buys round 4 of the roomie's booze. Patron.
JM sings Taking Back Sunday.
Around this time, a girl kills the whole Karoke Computer System by wanting to sing Paris Hilton stars are blind. So the bar helps out by acapellaing, Jingle Bells and then for equalities sake... the Driedal Song. HA... Ben provides amusement by cracking my roommate and me up with stupid stories about nate.
Round 4 (Nothing for me. Double Chilled Patron and Miller Light for Roomie) Around this time, the roomie wanted the phone I took away from her back. Thankfully, friends don't let friends drunk dial and RANT. Around this time, the roomie and I thought it would be a great idea to peel off beer labels and wear them as eye patches, so we could be the Beer pirate twins, (hahaha, when I do supportive, I go all the way supportive. Love it.) General chit chat around the table includes Nate's hitting on Paris Hilton Girl, why Ben was crazy as a young guy, ASVAB scores and helicopters. All had while we wore beer pirate patches.
Nor talks Ben into doing Micheal and Janet Jackson's Scream.
Round 5 (nothing for Me... roomie is still working on Miller Light) Drunk Roomie with me as backup sings... Salt-n-peppa "none of your business" I am not really sure if I was Salt or Peppa, but my job was to say None of you Business... loudly at the right intervals.... HA... We did get raucous applause, it could have been cause we were so bad... whatever.
Round 6 (water here, more Miller or maybe the same Miller for Roomie) Drunk Roomie and Ben preform Scream... complete with running man, ass shaking and a little slithering. Ben didn't know the words but he made up for it with style, pizzazz and a complete willingness to make a fool out of himself. Frankly, I find those qualities admirable in a man... Ben. Whereever you are. You Rock and you are more than welcome to crash Karaoke anytime.
Finally Nate closed out the night for us, with a "livin' la vida loca," back up dancers (that would be me and roomie) included. He put Ricky Martin to shame.
Then we took off for home, roomie yelling the song and me trying to keep her drunk ass in the car. Off to McDonalds we went, for some super sized fries.... I would tell you the story of the McDonalds drive through, but I want to save something for another day. But be aware, the McDonalds story involves a poor server named Luis and my roommate dang near breaking up his marriage. Ha.
posted by Shanelle at 9:20 AM
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