Just Say No... PLEASE DEAR GOD NO!!!
As I was perusing InStyle today, looking at "TRENDS AT ANY AGE!!!" I came to a momentous, life-altering, perhaps, dare I say it, world changing decision:
35 should be the official cut off for wearing a mini-skirt. And women larger than a size 2 and shorter than 5'7" should be jailed for wearing skinny pants. (exceptions being Heather Locklear, Demi Moore, and any other person, who can afford you know the personal trainers, that make those things (as I call skinny pants) okay... although might be nice for mankind if they set an example and didn't wear them on principal)
Think how much better the world would be if you got to go to the grocery store without seeing side fat hanging over the side of the skinny pants, if you didn't have to actively wince on behalf of many , many middle aged women squeezed into too tight jeans whose granny panty line is PLAINLY visable at a 10 yard distance, freeze in horror at the women whose bums have began the long trip south for winter.
Outlawing those horrors is better for the country in general. Posters could be put up, classes organized, it would be a ralling point for all, as well as clean up America's image as the unfortunate country that unleashed the horrors of BEDAZZLED EVERYTHING in the late nineties. I personally, think it would boost morale for women everywhere, as we could all look decent all the time.
Ralph Lauren could be our National Advisor on Fashion, with Michael Kors and Vera Wang as his deputies.
See the world is brighter already.
35 should be the official cut off for wearing a mini-skirt. And women larger than a size 2 and shorter than 5'7" should be jailed for wearing skinny pants. (exceptions being Heather Locklear, Demi Moore, and any other person, who can afford you know the personal trainers, that make those things (as I call skinny pants) okay... although might be nice for mankind if they set an example and didn't wear them on principal)
Think how much better the world would be if you got to go to the grocery store without seeing side fat hanging over the side of the skinny pants, if you didn't have to actively wince on behalf of many , many middle aged women squeezed into too tight jeans whose granny panty line is PLAINLY visable at a 10 yard distance, freeze in horror at the women whose bums have began the long trip south for winter.
Outlawing those horrors is better for the country in general. Posters could be put up, classes organized, it would be a ralling point for all, as well as clean up America's image as the unfortunate country that unleashed the horrors of BEDAZZLED EVERYTHING in the late nineties. I personally, think it would boost morale for women everywhere, as we could all look decent all the time.
Ralph Lauren could be our National Advisor on Fashion, with Michael Kors and Vera Wang as his deputies.
See the world is brighter already.
posted by Shanelle at 1:27 PM
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